Sandra Gail Lambert

Collective Fallout

 

Collective Fallout is an upcoming, print journal "dedicated to queer themed sci-fi, fantasy, horror, and mysteries."  And they have accepted a story of mine for their first issue.  When I know the release date, you'll know the release date.

Lately I've been awash, well in many ways, but especially in rejections.  I'm sure Pavlov would have something to say about how just one acceptance every now and then makes me go all yippy. 

I am online again. I am full of pie.

In the 90's a local group set up the Alachua Freenet.  They had meetings at the public library, gave out computer disks, taught us all how to set up our computers for a free dial up system, and were called the "Commie Net" by commercial Internet businesses.  I've been consistently on-line from then until three weeks ago.

I wasn't shocked by how dependent I am on the Internet, but the loneliness was a surprise.  I missed the personal back and forth of e-mails, Twitter, and Facebook.  And even though they have no idea who I am, I missed keeping up with the blog-documented going ons of agents, editors, and writers.  

And I couldn't blog routinely.  There are so many rejections I haven't whined about, unshared stories about the Old English Lady (my mother), and post-ACA tales. 

But here's a picture of me at ACA, before my mother's illness, while I was writing hours and hours every day. (Photo credit: Renee Ashley)

 

   

Mothers and motherboards

Well, my mother comes home from the hospital tomorrow.  And my computer, which is getting a new motherboard, might be ready before Thanksgiving.  Nevertheless, I am writing most mornings.  I sometimes fall asleep over the computer and wake up to a flurry of a's or o's across the screen from where my fingers weighed down, but I'm showing up.  

I'm not trying anything wild like forging ahead, but I rearrange sentences and expand scenes and trim dialog.  Next week, with any luck, the "big picture" writing will resume. 

Five Thousand Words

I think it's not worth it, that my mind is tired and scattered, but most mornings I get in my writing bed and start working.  Despite everything, those moments happen where a line of dialog seems perfect or a scene gets written that skips my mind and comes straight out of my hand and onto the page.  And it adds up.  The five thousand words on this chapter so far makes me smile a restorative smile every time I think about them. 

I'm still on a borrowed computer.  It's wonderful, but there won't be links or photographs on the blog for awhile.  You'll have to settle for my meanderings, unadorned.   

Writing again.

This morning, I worked on the current chapter for the first time since returning from ACA.  It's taken way to long to settle back in.  My computer is off to HP repair, but I'm using a graciously loaned to me laptop.  I've had to add a few essential writerly choices to my friend's toolbar - like "save," "undo," and "wordcount." 

I still don't have wireless.  I yearn for the almost forgotten ease of being propped up in my writing day bed and flipping back and forth from the internet to my writing.  Sigh.  The things we get used to.  I miss my daily internet dose of "Tell Me More." 

Well, I can only sit like this, huddled around the ethernet connection with the laptop actually on my lap, for a limited time.  Imagine my connections connecting. 

Election Day

I voted for Obama this morning.  This is an amazing thing that I got to do in my lifetime.  Sobs well up when I think about it. 

Nothing can mar the day.  Which is a good thing since I came home to my computer telling me that I don't have a wireless connection.  Worse yet, I think I'm going to have to send the computer back to HP for repairs.  Every time I think about what this means - blog, writing, e-mail, unavailability for rejections - something bad happens inside my chest. 

So, maybe not much blogging for awhile.  And back to the yellow pads for writing.  And I guess I'll go to the library for e-mail.  There are solutions. 

Anyway, ACA was trans-formative.  And the last day was lovely.  Kayaking with friends, relaxing at the ocean, fried shrimp, crab balls, and ice cream.  The aforementioned friends packed up my van and then unpacked it back in Gainesville.  That help changed what is being possible this week. 

Well, tomorrow I'm off to Circuit City with my computer.